Chapter1:Hidden Beauty - A dream?

Oh is it very far? I guess it would be difficult, I cant move anymore Ram! Just hold my hand, I will make the journey easier. As he said, he held my hand tight with so much care that I could just feel his love!

I promise I will show you best beauty in few minutes. I was wondering what that beauty was.

We walked through many hurdles and there were places where I almost gave up and stood there still, Ram tapped my back and with small breaks, we continued our journey. I could hear something, there he closed my eyes and asked me to follow his instructions, I did how I was told,  I could feel few droplets on my face, the sounds gradually became bigger though it was pleasant. He asked me to open my eyes slowly and in front of me, I could see water flowing on top of a huge rock and added to it there were two such falls. I stood there still with my eyes wide open, completely lost in the beauty!
Ram brought me back to this world, he asked me if I liked the surprise?

Sometimes actions speaks more than words, I kissed him on the forehead and we lay there hugging for a long time. Ram started speaking, it was always my dream to get you here when I first visited this place. I hugged him even more tight.

Strangely there were no people around. I asked him how he got to know about this beautiful place and how there were no people around. He smiled and said, it is completely remote place and noticed it when he came along with his adventurous friends. People started recognizing this falls lately and it is slowly growing as tourism spot, generally at this late hour it will be free. So, its kind of hidden beauty which gave me my First kiss, saying this he winked at me. I buried my head in his chest feeling shy.



who is this "I"  narrating story to us?

For more details, Follow me next week;)

Guys! I am back with new story. Get ready for the series!

Harika Bojanala
Go Green...Save Trees

I used to wonder, now I feel it...The various roles we take up!

She is such kind of person who creates an huge empty space, when she is not around in anyone's life, be it a friend, be it Mom, Dad, be it a sibling, everyone misses her company, everyone longs for her presence.

She never harms anyone, and she never thinks negative even in her wildest dreams!She has got something in loads...Self respect!

If  anyone new, sees her, they think she has got an attitude problem...the more closer you get, the more you understand her.

She immediately changes herself to opposites person's age and matches their frequency and will make us feel... Arey, why didn't I know her from long time.

By any chance if you get anger on her, I bet it never stays more than a day!she is kind of magnet you just get attracted!

All it takes is one beautiful smile of her's and that is it...you just say yes to whatever she says!

Cheers to all women in the world who transforms from a sweet little child to naughty teen, beautiful wife, loving mother and caring grandma and I know, lot more transformations which does not have an end;)

Your's
Harika.

Go Green...Save Trees

Chapter 18:Together Forever:)

Time has power to heal...yes, I accepted this truth and my life is perfect example for proof. It is Sanjay, who made me realize that I do not have to torture myself for someone else's faults.This words he had once told me, still act as mantra during my tough times

Sanju, "Life is how you take it and respond to situations, make it the best! Replace all negativity with happy minutes and you will feel heaven!, not only he said this words, he installed happiness capsules with his presence"

With Sanjay, I was not excited for anything initially, I was under assumption that I would never get close to anyone after Pramod. If I had fallen so much for something which is unreal, how would it be if it is true love.

I am always thankful to God that I eventually found true love in my life. The more I tried to move away from Sanjay, the more he became close to me. Since I was fired out of job, my credit card bills piled up and I could not pay a rupee. All sources of income got shut down and I was forced to work back to clear this debts first, I still had that self respect not to ask someone to clear my debts on behalf of me.

I always had the zeal to work in creative field, thank God my multimedia course which I did through distance education while I was working helped me. I started my career back as a fresher, but in add agency.

This new challenging career diverted my thoughts to certain extent.But I still was over weight and more obsessed with food.

Me and Sanjay, used to meet once in a while and we started understanding each other. He was glad that I chose different career altogether and I was growing slowly in it. Fort night meetings slowly turned out to meetings twice in a week.

It turned out to be like my happiness was not happiness until I shared it with Sanjay. It was same with him. There were no secrets, no egos between us, we did not try to impress each other and we were just us and still we liked each other. I was not sure whether it was LOVE. But Sanjay kept on insisting that it was LOVE.

I was not ready to name that relationship with Sanjay as LOVE and spoil so called sweet time I was having with him. Almost after one year of my work in the new company brought me back my confidence, independence and zeal to work more and earn more.

I started looking out to seek more challenging roles and Sanjay offered me a position in his company with good pay, he also mentioned that he was not giving it just like that and I had to undergo whole recruitment process just like others who came to interview, I was more than happy with the way he separated work from personal life. I cleared all the rounds and was through.

Well, I was in Sanjay's office. It was kind of strange, happy and weird at a time to me.Sanjay came personally to my cabin and introduced me to my new team and explained the process briefly.It was a nice day. After the induction program, Sanjay winked at me while handling the bank application form to fill in my details to open new salary account. I smiled at him and thanked him for everything. He said it's all your hard work.

We drove back together that day and in car Sanjay asked me for a treat and I gladly said an YES. He put a condition that he would select the place and while driving, all the way I was talking, talking and continuously talking until Sanjay said that we reached the restaurant. I nodded at him in acceptance and smiled at him. He was surprised to see me talking so much.

I got down and realized that it was same garden restaurant in which we met each other first time. It brought me back the memories of my rude behavior and how I ruined that day. I felt sorry for Sanjay. I wanted to make this day the best day to him and when we come back to this restaurant we should remember the happy time and not the other one.

I looked at him and he asked me if I was comfortable with this place or we should drive back to other one. I was like, Yes, Yes I am comfortable Sanjay. His lips widened and suddenly he moved forward and bent down just as sign of inviting me inside, I laughed at his gesture and moved forward and held his hand and started walking. I myself was surprised when I held his hand. May be I was accepting him in my life, may be I started liking him a lot, may be I am in Love all over again.

Sanjay was like a kid, I could just see it in his eyes. He was very happy. We went and picked up the same table and he passed the menu card to me saying that it's my day. I ordered half of his favorite dishes and half mine. We spoke and stayed there till the waiters gave awkward looks at us. I signaled  Sanjay that it's already late and asked him to look at the waiter laughing.

After some time we finally stood up and Sanjay bought smile in waiter's face by giving huge amount as a tip, he saluted and thanked him and asked us to have nice time. we walked back till the car. I insisted that I will drive that day, I generally fight like this, only with my dad and brother. Sanjay had also become someone special in my life. I started driving back and Sanjay sat beside me telling stories and making me laugh. He suddenly asked me to stop the car. I did as he said and looked at him confused. He took my hands in to his and asked will you stay like this forever?

I was in tears, he is just asking me to be happy.I moved forward hugged him for a while and whispered, Yes, I will. Sanjay hugged me even tighter and kissed me on my forehead. He slowly planted a kiss on my lips. It was soon intense.

We drove back to home. Though it was late night and cold outside, Sanjay dropped me home and went back to his home. I dropped him a message this time,

Never knew, I was in LOVE with you,

Never knew, I would miss you,

Never knew, you would become so special in my life

I LOVE YOU SANJAY.

Muaaahhh:)
sanjana.

I guess Sanjay was still driving , I didnt get a reply fast. With every passing minute I got tensed more, expecting how Sanjay's reply would be, after 10 minutes, my mobile started flashing with series of messages. All of them were from Sanjay,

Never knew, you would say this magical words in my life,

Never knew, I would go through this amazing phase in my life.

My life is complete with your presence,

You have no idea, how happy I am today.

Can't wait to be back in your hugs.

Lots of Loveee,
Sanjay.

After 2 days, there were knocks at my door and I rushed to open the door and it was, oh my God, Mom Dad and my brother. I just jumped around seeing my family after a long time. They were all looking at me mysteriously and smiling. It was me and Sanjay, worked out together how to break the news to my family, I was too shy to discuss this matters with my parents, so we both went ahead with my brother and he made all this possible.

We, finally got married dhoom dhaam se. My friends, were back and we had maximum possible fun.
Me and Sanjay started working on developing our company together. Big news is that Neha and my sweet brother are in relationship. I was in cloud nine when I heard the news from them.

Our gang, me, Sanjay, Neha, Sanchit was extended with my brother Samrudh. Whenever we plan a trip I used to remember Pramod.If a girl gets hurt more than intended, sooner or latter it will definitely turn out to be HATRED, yes, I was hating Pramod to peeks, deleting his contacts, emails, conversations was not enough for me. I deeply needed something to hurt him back to satisfy my ego.

It so happened that one day , I got a phone call from an unknown number and I picked it up and there was someone laughing out loud and someone calling Hey Pramod, I clearly understood it was a dial by mistake and it was Mr.Pramod. I cut the call almost instantly and Sanjay noticed sudden change in me and and asked me who was that in the call. I told him it was Pramod with anger, Sanjay gave a smile and said...Sanju see, If I am correct, one day Pramod would realize all his faults and will call you back and apologize for everything he had done to you, saying it he added back his contact in my phone.

It was Sanjay, who calmed me down and make me forget Pramod completely.Though I have him in my memories till date, it requires some instant to probe me to remember him, like today's phone call which took me back to flood of memories.

I resumed my sleep, but got a call again. It displayed Pramod's name again. I picked it up and said a Hi again. I am sorry Sanjana, for whatever I have done to you, for making you lose trust in people, I realized my mistakes, God has given me proper punishment for playing around with people like you. I really felt sad after listening to his words. I asked him to calm down, and asked him what went wrong.

He said he is in Banglore and asked me if he could meet me next day. I said I would meet him next day and asked him to be cool and cut the call. I was feeling restless, I did not know how to respond, I called up Sanjay and told him every thing in detail.Sanjay asked me to meet him next day and asked me to help Pramod if he needs anything. I feel better after talking to Sanjay. I wish he is here so that we can go together and meet Pramod.

Pramod, he looked very pale and lost all his charm, he had lost lots of weight and looked like a patient. He gave a brief smile and I half smiled not knowing how to respond. we met in coffee day and he ordered my favorite stuff.  I was like, you still remember this Pramod?
He smiled his natural smile and nodded.

Me: Now, tell me what's wrong? why are you meeting me after long time?

Pramod: I played with so many people know, so this time for a change, God, played around with me,

Me: Hmm, Dont be so diplomatic. Everything will have a solution

Pramod: After reaching Mumbai, I got in to a new company and you knew it

Me: yeah!

Pramod: I made a women fall for me there and tried to reach higher position in illegal ways. She somehow got to know whole story about me and gave a complaint to higher authorities and they terminated me from my job and sent me to prison for a year. I was under assumption that my intelligence would work and I can escape from such stuff so easily, all the contacts whom I had once thought that would help me, just did not respond to me and no one were even ready to see my face even after I was released. During that year in prison, I realized what all sins I have committed, how people feel when they are cheated and I personally wanted to meet people and request for forgiveness.

Me(I really felt sorry for his position): Hmm, well, Past is Past Pramod, you start a new life with new dreams and aims. Error is human. So, start leading a new life.

Pramod: Please say that you forgive me.

Me: If I had held grudges on you, I would not have come to meet you , so, I forgave you long back.

Pramod: Smiling at me said a thank you.

Me: Is there anything that I should do that would help you?

Pramod: I am very happy Sanjana, even after getting so much hurt, you are offering me a help.

Me: Well, that's what Sanjay taught me:)

Pramod: Cool. I will take your leave now, I will meet you guys after a year or so completely transforming to a good human being and doing good things.

Me(I guess Pramod changed really, and I was very happy for that): Wish you Good luck Pramod. I will be glad when you are in a good position.

He bid a goodbye and left the place.

I drove back to my home, called up Sanjay and informed him everything, he said he is proud of me:)

After 2 days:

There was knock on the door, I ran fast expecting Sanjay. As soon as I opened the door it was Sanjay smiling, he got in, hugged me and said I miss you, I whispered in his ears "I miss you too"

This continues forever:):)


I dedicate this story to my Mom, Amrutha  and Dad, Ranga, because of whom, I learnt the meaning of Love.

To my brother, Chandu, most of the brother related lines in this story are our conversations:)

To Santhosh,  when you said, you would encourage me writing stories and when you respected my thoughts, it meant a lot to me:)


I  feel thankful to God for making me have this 2 wonderful people in my life, Shwetha and Archana, I always wonder how my life would be, If I had not met you people:)

Also, I heart fully thank my friends, Harika, Swathi, Reddy, Poornima and Archana for following up the story till end, though I missed posting it many times.

Finally I end with apologies for not staying in touch with you guys every week and  for being irregular in posting episodes.

I will be back with few short stories in a while:)

Harika Bojanala:)
Go Green...Save Trees












 

Chapter 17: The other version

Wheels started rotating forward and the auto sped up as fast as tears that poured down from my eyes. If one person cheats me may be that was his problem to understand me properly, if same thing happens with everyone...I just could not take it any more. I turned violent, I just wanted to exit this world and enter in to a new world where there is no place for hatred, deception and vengeance.

Sanjay kept on calling me whole way till I reached my home. I slid the door open and fell down, just like how I did when Pramod didn't turn up that day, but today there is a difference, how much I waited for Promod's presence that day, I am hating Sanjay's presence more than that.

I was brought back to real world, someone were knocking hard on the door, hmm it was Sanjay. I banged the door so hard, that he would get irritated and leave,but he did not do that, instead he sat in corridor, I didn wanted to create big scene in my home too,So I let him in.

"Sanju, please listen to me, just give me 10 minutes to speak, even after that if you don't like to listen to me, I will never ever disturb you in my life and it is a promise!", Mr.Sanjay blurted out. After wasting so much time on so many people I felt good that he asked me only for 10 minutes of time. So, I gladly accepted and it went beyond an hour.

Sanju, I first saw you in Bangalore, in your office, when your company chief had called me regarding an add, that was it, I was taken away to a special world as soon as I saw you, still, it was the first impression for me about you, I wanted it to be very special to you, that's how I tried so many ways and approached you with letters and finally we met today, and I know it's the worst impression to you on me.

As soon as I liked you, I approached your brother and he was very happy about it and was excited to tell you, it's me who stopped them and asked them for some time.

I thought it was all going fine, until I came to know about Pramod's presence in your life.

I made my ears more straight to listen to his words with the mention of Pramod's name.

Sanjay observed change in the expression in my face but ignored it and went on with his words which made me clueless how he was

Pramod, well, I got to know that you and Pramod were in a relationship but you guys broke up recently. (hmm so Sanjay doesn't know about it before)

How shocked your brother was when you told him about Pramod, it was more in mine when your brother told me about your relationship.

But I was really worried that you have gone crazy about him and I know how it feels when someone meant your life and if they ruin each of your dream and disappear from it.

Trust me, I really am not that cheap to drag someone to love me who is already in a relationship. I shut down all my thoughts about you with lots of effort and tried to make you happy again by getting Pramod back in to your life. But, he really is sick Sanju, he is big time flirt and never cares for women's feelings and you would never be happy even if he is back in to your life.

With this he finished speaking. I kept on staring him with out saying a word. He watched me for a while, and could not bear it anymore.

YOUR SILENCE KILLS ME SANJU, Please say something.

Hmm, I can't trust anyone Mr.Sanjay, but I can say sorry for my rude behavior in the restaurant. 

Sanjay's eyes lit up just with my simple words. He spoke with me some more time, finally made me smile and left. I thanked him for the day and bid him Goodbye, but not forever:))

A message popped up in my phone, it was one of the best days in my life, had wonderful day with you, I could see your happiness, anger, forgiveness and most of all a kid in you just in the first official meet after me falling in LOVE with you...Thank you Sanju.

Love,
Sanjay.

Before I could respond, one more message popped up from Sanjay, Give time for everything..even me;) Time has power to heal.

I sent back a smiley and called up my brother and informed him every single minute in detail.


All misunderstandings were cleared with just one conversations.

What next??

Follow me next week
Harika Bojanala:)

Go green...Save trees

 

Chapter 16: Goodbye Forever!

Three months...they just passed on very peacefully, with out much harm to me, except that my friends stopped talking to me, stopped coming to my place since I didn't let them in, I was fired out from my job and I got confirmation letter of the same. Thanks to credit card..I survived only because of it in the last month.

After seeing Pramod cheat me so badly inspite of putting my 100% on him, me getting fired, loosing friends, putting on weight seemed small things to me. I got over Pramod completely, may be in different version, like I don't remember him much now, I don't try to draft emails anymore, I simply stopped him from intruding in my life.

Exactly me and Sanjay finished our deadline of 3 months and it was time for me to make things clear to Mr. Sanjay!

I was just surprised to see a letter and appreciated his timings. God, he is crazy!

Here it goes...As if he read my mind, this time chocolates were Diary milk silk and snickers which I made as routine to eat them while watching TV shows.

Sanju,

I have seen you, while we both were kids, while we used to stand for each other when someone fights with us, while you used to kiss me innocently on my cheeks when I got you some thing.

After long long time, I was just mesmerized when I first saw you in Banglore, I was there, exactly in your office(you wonder when and how...well, everything will be answered while we meet personally), and you were perfect meaning of beauty.

(I was grinning at the mention of the word beauty-he would no longer like me)

Right from the day I met you, my world was completely filled by your presence, I figured out so many ways to impress you...as soon as I thought about word impress...first thing that striked my mind was LOOKS, latter came the personality and all others. I didn't wanted my LOVE to be like every others..it should be as pure as Mother's love. So I never met you....I just wanted to let you know who I am and how I think through my words..and what else can convey person's feelings as good as a letter...So I chose to send you letters.

I hope you liked me..I mean by what ever you understood me until now.

Much excited to meet you.

Lots of Love,
Sanjay.

Hmm...I let out a deep sigh...God, I am still not sure how this guy would respond after seeing me...looks like he is somewhat different from others and God Knows what all he is saying!Whatever it is, I will meet him and tell him my version.

It was all set, I just bathed, turned in to my loosest outfit earlier which have become tight now,  I made it fit with lots of difficulty, I slept so much all these days because of heavy food I guess, my eyes were swollen first time in months with peaceful sleep rather than sleepless nights.

He just called me and informed me the place where I should reach, he insisted on him picking me from my home, I rudely said a NO.

I was picturing how he would be now, after 15 years of gap might be. He was tall but little plump when he was a kid, I started imagining him as overgrown kid, which sounded funny to myself. I could see someone sitting at table 5, which was reserved by Mr. Sanjay. The image happened to be clearer as I reached nearer. Oh my God, he was Handsome, he was no more a overgrown kid. He was 6 feet tall, tanned but fairer skin, completely, he was pleasant and decent looking.

He waved at me from far as soon  as he caught sight of me, I waved him back in response.I just reached the table and he smiled immediately and said Hi Sanju, I smiled back at him and said him a Hi back.

We both occupied our seats, it was a garden restaurant, all surroundings were GREEN, they have arranged small chairs and tables in between, creating a beautiful path. Rather then usual Ac restaurants, we were breathing fresh air in the garden, I could not stop complementing him for the selection , "Nice taste", I told him looking all around with ease.

Thank you Sanju..I am happy you liked it. He asked me if he had changed anything from last time I saw him, yes man, you have become more awesome, I told to myself but I just told him "obviously, yes, all of us will change."

He did not expect that answer I guess, I could see it in his eyes. That is all I wanted, I just want to move out of his heart and wipe away all feelings if at all he had any. He recovered soon and initiated one more conversation, mean while he ordered Manchow soup and asked me if I was fine with it.

I just started of with my points, which are all I had planned to tell him,

Sanjay, I am sorry to say this, I generally don't like to hurt people by any means,  I am just not in any plan to mary you. I am really sorry for everything.

His face was plain, no expression, I had imagined so much.

He smiled...God I could not take this, I have told him something very serious and he still smiles.

He started off like this

well, Sanju, I guessed your answer would be a NO, I was all prepared for this, that's how I did not react much, when you said this. I just want to clarify one thing, are you saying NO to me just because of Pramod, if that is the reason, just FORGET him, he is sick.

I was dumb struck and shocked to know that he knew about Pramod in my life. I felt betrayed, he knew everything, still he sent me letters when I was still in relationship with Pramod.

I yelled at him, he is not, you are sick Mr.sanjay. Good bye forever! Never ever try to meet me again. I said Good bye!I just left the place and got in to an auto.


Did really Sanjay played with Sanjana while he knew all about their relationship? did he play any role in spoiling their relationship?

Follow me next week

Harika Bojanala:)
Go Green...save trees

Chapter 15:Mission

As I reached home, I forgot about my phone, accidentally, I saw an Diary milk silk stuck in my fridge, I picked it up and finished whole of it at one shot, I never knew what it was, anger, happy or sad. I generally eat 2 bytes of it and not more than that with fear of my diet getting disturbed.

Strangely the chocolate gave me relief, now I have an idea, I will eat more, turn out shapeless and this so called Sanjay will reject me after seeing me. wow, Sanjana, what a brilliant you are, I said to myself. At that moment I was not aware of after effects of putting on weight.

I opened my hand bag to pick out face wash then I remembered I had put my phone in silent. I checked notifications and saw 20 missed calls and 3 new messages. Missed calls, 15 were from office, I knew there was something wrong with work but who cares already my life is screwed up, work, no longer mattered to me.

3 calls where from Sanjay. 1 was from Neha and other was from my brother. I put phone back in volume mode and called my brother. Spoke to him for a while and hung up. Instead of telling him my sad story, I will make Sanjay himself to say no to me. That was a mission for me, I went to nearest store picked up all variety of fatty foods, ordered pizzas and whichever can help me put on weight fast.Mr.Sanjay get ready to see fatty ugly Sanjana.

That had become my routine to eat more and more food and no workout and skip office and not picking calls of anyone.In this process, I hardly remembered Pramod. I was enjoying this new lonely life, in which ruler, people followers everything is me, which does not have someone to cheat me.

After 5 days in this process, I received courier directly to home. Awe! this guy is disgusting, I thought to myself. It was a letter from Sanjay, and chocolates, woww, now I was happy seeing chocolates and grabbed them first instead of letter;)

While eating chocolate I opened letter to read, here it goes,

Thank you sooo much for Birthday wishes, It was overwhelming for me, that you remembered my birthday with out me saying it. Anyways, can I talk to you, I mean through phone?

Sanjay

Though I didn't bother about his letters, it did feel little different when he didn't mention lots of love or something like that. My system just got used to his words and expected the same this time too.
I should meet him in another 2 months after achieving my mission, till that time I want everything to be shut, like his messages, letters, phone calls and everything.To make that happen, I should call him and give him valid reason to stop everything for 2 months.

I did background work for it till evening and called him at around 5 P.M. Tring tring...I was little tensed, it went as a long ring,but he didn't pick, I was irritated, he did not pick Sanjana's call..unknowingly I demanded his attention, I had built up my mind that he have special place for me and he gives high priority to me.

I guess after an hour, I got a call from Mr.Sanjay. I picked it up after 40 seconds of ring, I didn't wanted to sound desperate for his call. I picked it up and there it went flow of words, Thank God, Sanjana you called me, I am very happy he was still saying something, how can someone speak like this even after around 15 years of gap, I was like my mouth wide open for his closeness in first meeting.

I think after 1 minute he gave a pause for breath and then I said a plain Hello Sanjay, how are you?
He said he was fine and it went on like this

Sanjay: I am good. How about you? Did you get angry on me for my letters?
Me(Did not expect so many questions):hmm, na, nothing like that
Sanjay: Then you very happy with them right, great
Me: no, no, I mean, I didnot have any feeling
Sanjay(disappointed I guess): ohhhkay, do you like, really remember me Sanjana?
Me: Yeah, ofcourse, I do remember, you were my only friend at that time
Sanjay: Laugh..:)). So you are working in a reputed company and living independently, am proud of you
Me(who is he to feel proud of me): hmm Thank you, where are you now?
Sanjay: I am in Banglore, owning an add agency.
Me: So you sent me letters staying in same place, right?
Sanjay: Yeah, I believe letters convey original feelings and I spend a lot of time to write perfectly, at this process I end up thinking more and more about you.
Me(OMG...I should hung up phone soon):hmm, I need to tell you something important
Sanjay: yes, tell me any time for you,
Me: Don't get excited, it is nothing like what you expected me to say
Sanjay: that's okay I can digest facts
Me: I need some time to figure out myself, please don't disturb me till then with phone calls, letters or messages
Sanjay:okay, till when?
Me(will he not have any reaction I just said something which I though would completely make him sad): hmm, around 3 months
Sanjay: Sure, its a deal, I will not.
Me: Thank you so much
Sanjay:Nice talking to you Snaju, after long time..take care...Bye and he hung up

Sanju, awww...he used to call me Sanju when we were kids, I remembered everything, that sweetness, innocence, how we used to fight for candies, how we used stay together when some one fought with one of us during games.After a long time, a genuine smile passed through my face.

I felt very relaxed after Sanjay accepted that he would not contact me by any means for 3 months.
3 months...I have ample time to put on weight and look as ugly as possible.

So sanjana is on a mission, and who knows Sanjay might also be in other mission to meet her after 3 months?

Follow me..next week

Harika Bojanala:)
Go Green...Save trees

Chapter 14:Love happens with out effort????:)

I was alone again in the whole world!My brother gave me space to think and left me all alone and went out. Sanjay, I tried recollecting his memories and time we spent together...oops! your brain is currently disordered and it stopped working!! I felt this message when I started thinking.

How much ever I try, I start associating everything with Pramod, if he was here, we would have done it in different way, every minute would have become wonderful, if at all he had not left me like this, by this time, I would have introduced Pramod to my family and they would have been more happy, that I was matured enough to choose a guy and we would have celebrated it in a big way:(:(

"Calm down Sanjana, its all not real, he is not going to come back to your life, don't try to cheat yourself expecting impossible things!' I said to myself. For a minute, I feel strong," I am completely over your thoughts Pramod, you can no longer play with my life, this is my life, I will live it to 100% and you are not remote control to my happiness" I started saying this words loud. That's when my brother came back, he started smiling listening to this words.

You are absolutely on right track, my sweet sister, Just boost up like this, u will soon forget that there was Pramod in your life, saying this he patted my back.

I smiled back at him and yay! we were back to our original brother sister fights for silly things and playing kind of stuff. He stayed till night and he had to leave for an urgent issue in office. Finally he asked me to be strong and he would be visiting me once in a while, and he brought up Sanjay topic again!God!!But what he said was quite relaxing.

Sanju, I know you need time, don't think much about Sanjay too, its all in your hands to build a bright future and peaceful life, the reason I am stressing about him is, I felt he would suit you and you would be safe and happy in his hands. Again, we are not stressing you or something, you just give it a try, if it works out fine, Remember nothing happens with out effort!

I nodded like a small kid to his every word. I bid him Goodbye and gifted him his favorite snickers!he grabbed it, gave me a small hug asked me to take care and left, leaving his brotherlyhood memories and charm with me.

Nothing happens with out effort!! this words echoed in my brain, but Pramod, it just happened to me with out any effort, may be, that is how he didnot stay in my life and  just left me like a passing cloud!My brother missed this point, Love always happens with out effort!

Dear brain, If you shut down for a while, I will happily sleep, I told this to stupid brain so many times, but it did not listen, getting frustrated, I took my phone in to hands, felt like throwing it far away with all my strength. But rather I kept quite, I already lost Pramod, why should I loose anything else just because of him.

I suddenly got urge to show my anger on him, how to show my anger, how to get this frustration out of my head, what do I do?? somehow I was seeing his messages and hit delete by mistake. Surprisingly, I felt little relaxed doing it, I deleted all of his messages one by one, then his pics and finally his number from contact list.

I was still not feeling happy, So I logged in to my Facebook account and blocked him permanently and unfriended him, to which my lips extended broadly, So I started putting away his memories, who knows may be one day as my brother said, I would forget there was Pramod in my life!

I slept peacefully that night and got up and unlocked my screen, it had become practise to see Pramod's pic in my phone every morning! Now he is gone, I recollected what I did day before and felt how stupid I was to do that.

Now, I don't have Pramod in real, Pramod in my pics too:( This mixed feelings made me sick and mad. Atleast to wish something to God, I was not sure on what I wanted!

Somehow I dragged myself to office without anyone's intervention. I was in office and Neha was surprised to see me, but she was still angry I guess, though she was quite eager to come and talk to me, her ego pushed her back, since it was my fault, I went greeted her Good Morning and said sorry for what I did, she is always first to forgive, so she smiled and we both went to cafeteria to speak.

She was happy that my brother was there. She always gets excited when I say something about my brother, I could see it in her eyes. She believes from my words that he is quite good decision maker.I always used to tell her, because of my stupid decisions, he became good in my home;)

Then she too started with same Sanjay thing and asked me to think about it. I was irritated again, just the though of him is making me to think about Pramod, and I hated him more for that.

We went back to work. As usual, I could not concentrate and added to it, I left office in an hour with out informing anyone.This time Courier boy was waiting outside my office, since he saw me comming down to hand over the letter from Mr. Sanjay

God!!I didn't wanted to create one more scene in office, I just stared at the boy and took the letter seriously and left the place.

The pack was even more colorful, God, it had a childhood pic of me and sanjay holding hands and posing for photograph, for a second I smiled seeing it and remembered that moment, our parents made us get ready especially to take us to studio and we both were like very much excited with our new dresses and yeah it was Sanjay's Bday that day, I suddenly remembered the day and it is today. I guess he is quite smart in thinking now. He just sent his mobile number in letter today. If it was someone else in my place, they would have definitely fallen for his ideas and the effort he was taking to hold a special place in girl's heart. "EFFORT", it felt strange that I was saying this words by myself.

I was not that cruel to disappoint some one on their Birthday. So, I just took my phone and texted him

Happy Birthday Sanjay:)

and yeah nothing else. I didnt wanted to throw wrong directions to him, that I was interested in talking to him and all.

Next morning, I would message him that I  seriously have no ideas to hang around with him and tell him to have a bright future with someone else and live happily, I made up my mind strongly and hit enter and the message reached him in a second.

After this I put my phone in silent and dumped in to handbag, expecting a call from office, I lost interest in everything.


They got a medium, very fast medium to communicate now, how did Sanjay react to her message, did he call her?

Check it out next week

Harika Bojanala:)
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